I had a little coughing fit in the car this morning—I hate it when my coffee goes down the wrong pipe—and decided to keep both hands on the steering wheel as I tried to simultaneously clear my windpipe and merge into rush-hour traffic.  A certain 39-inch passenger was unmoved by my predicament.

“Cover! Your! MOUF!” she ordered from her throne in the backseat.

I didn’t know whether to be proud or terrified.