aaryn belfer.

His wife and daughter went to Beirut. That might be all we need to know about that situation.

Posted by Cheri @ Blog This Mom! on 5 March 2009 @ 7am

Maybe he should take in some families that lost their homes already and they can chip in for the mortgage payment together?

Posted by san on 5 March 2009 @ 8am

@Aaryn: His mortgage is $8,700/month, not $4K (according to TFA)

@Cheri: I’m have no idea what you’re saying, but why do I get this feeling I’m not gonna like it. (i.e. “What in the world does the fact his wife and daughter are in Beirut have to do with anything???”)

Posted by Robert K on 5 March 2009 @ 8am

@san: I’m with you. He should take in roomies to pay the bills.

To Chadi:
Times are tough homie, get over it and move on… into a smaller house, and get used to places like IKEA and Tarzhay. They are more fun than you think. Also, get over yourself.

Posted by Leslie on 5 March 2009 @ 9am

I read this article this morning and totals thought the same thing! Who the HELL has 500k in cash for a down payment and then has the gall to say, “What about me?” You’re right Chadi, what about you?

The point of the mortgage assistance program is to help people who are 2 boxes of cheerios away from being DESTITUTE! If one chooses to live WAY beyond their means in a 5 bajillion square ft. house that I can imagine he never needed in the first place, then this pity party is gonna be poorly attended my dear Chadi.

Posted by LilSass on 5 March 2009 @ 9am

I am also not clear about the intent of your comment, Cheri. I don’t think whether his wife left for Beirut or Baltimore is pertinent.

And you are correct, Robert, that his mortgage payment is now $8700/mo. The quote I pulled said that he had a 4k monthly payment for the first year, which I can only assume means he had some sort of adjustable rate? Certainly this is a complicated story, people losing their homes and the wealthy are apparently not immune. But it doesn’t mean this man isn’t just a little bit offensive to me. I can’t speak for others.

I guess my point is that he is a *perfect* example of Americans living way beyond their means. At any point during the time since he bought his price-inflated McMansion, he could/should have made some adjustments to his lifestyle. He was living the high life and is now crying about not getting governmental help when I thought the help was supposed to be for the little guy and not the big guy who gets to use all the loopholes.

But we can disagree.

Posted by aaryn b. on 5 March 2009 @ 10am

I really want to feel badly for him (because, despite the scale, losing it all sucks,) but it’s really hard to personally.

I find it offensive too, and maybe that’s just biased because I grew up with parents who struggled and struggled for us to have anything at all. This guy could have had a nice enough home with that cash he used for the down payment (and thus NO MORTGAGE/NO DEBT), or at the very least a nice enough home close to the million mark. Just because at one time in your life you can afford to shell out $4,000 a month doesn’t mean you will always be able to, nor does it mean that it makes sense to. Shit, I have money in the bank to go buy a $500 pair of jeans, but I’m not going to because I may need that money TOMORROW.

I know some of it is my own bitterness because you know, my parents never wasted a cent, and they still don’t have a lot — not because they lived frivolously — but because they didn’t make much money, didn’t have insurance at my dad’s labor-intensive job, and had three babies to feed. So I know I project a lot of misplaced anger at people like this who had it all and didn’t tone anything down and who could have lived so comfortably but still get themselves into so much trouble. I am CONFOUNDED by your terrible decisions!

Posted by AJ on 5 March 2009 @ 10am

It’s a slippery slope when we start judging, no matter how offensive the situation. Who decides where the line is between having empathy or disgust? I think their are *perfect* examples of American famililes living well beyond their means all up and down the socioeconomic grid.

Posted by S on 5 March 2009 @ 1pm

@S when people to choose to live outside their means and then expect HELP is when we ARE entitled to judge. You know why I can judge? Because it’s my money, my tax money, supporting these bills. Generally, I function under the ‘if it’s not my business then it ain’t my bidness’ kinda rule. But this guy is whining about his situation, which I am having a hard time finding empathy for. And when people make CHOICES that a/effect others, then I can judge. Right Nadya Suleman? Just like when you went all baby makin’ on us and California tax payers are footin’ the bill?

*ahem*

/rant

Posted by LilSass on 5 March 2009 @ 2pm

I KEEP HEARING these stories.

I took the time to read Buying a House for Dummies before I bought my first home, and I knew an adjustable rate mortgage or a balloon payment or an interest only loan was a bad idea BEFORE the economy turned crappy.

I bought a house I could afford with guaranteed payments I could afford, and I have to pay to get them out from under bad decisions?

And I keep hearing economists say its better for the economy to keep these people in their homes paying their mortgages even if we carry them for a while or renegotiate for them. OK then, when this us all fixed and everyone is stable again, I want MY slice.

Cash will be fine.

Posted by Becca on 5 March 2009 @ 3pm

@LilSass I def see what you are saying. My bigger point was that the a good portion of people currently in a financial pickle, be them in a 2 million dollar home or a 200k home, damn well knew they were getting into something they couldn’t handle in the best of times let alone with a job loss or other unexpected calamity. I don’t think we should hold the rich in particular contempt, it’s all relative and I believe the majority of us are a little guilty. There are so many people and organizations that have operated irresponsibly to cause the mess that currently exists and the truth of the matter is that many of them will or already have received assistance.

Posted by S on 5 March 2009 @ 6pm

It was a sweeping judgment, as sweeping judgments were mentioned in Aaryn’s commentary, and meant as a joke. Which apparently didn’t sit too well. My apologies.

Posted by Cheri @ Blog This Mom! on 5 March 2009 @ 7pm

By the way, I would have said it if his wife had left for Beirut or Baltimore. Nothing was meant by the destination, just that she’d left.

Again, I apologize.

Posted by Cheri @ Blog This Mom! on 5 March 2009 @ 7pm

My first thought is “Cry me a river.”

I will say, upon reading the article, that some of the statements about the logistics of the situation–the bank not being able to recoup its cost if it forecloses, etc. make some sense. It would be better for all of us if the lenders started operating with some common sense.

I don’t understand why people need to live so high on the hog though–there was a time (before the stock market crash) when I too could have had a million dollar plus home. But why?

Posted by Jenn @ Juggling Life on 5 March 2009 @ 8pm

Hi all,

I have read all of your comments. I can understand many of the points that you are making. However, one part that I can’t make sense off is why are you attacking this guy personally? Perhaps when he bought his house in 2005, he was making the enough money to afford it. We all know now that the industry that he is in is not doing well at all. Who is to be blamed for the fall of the car business? Him? I don’t think so.

The fact that he is still in his house means that he is still fighting to stay in it. The fact that he is asking for a modification that results in lowering the interest rate and extending the term is a very valid and reasonable request. He is not asking for the reduction of the balance or the use of tax payers’ money. What I understand from the article that he is asking the lender to reduce his monthly payments for couple years until his industry revives again.

Also, some of you mentioned that he should move to a less home. Well, that sounds like a great idea. However, how do you expect him to do so? If he owes double on this house, then obviously he can neither sell it nor can he refinance it. In addition, I can bet that half of the people here did not expect that all of us would be here today couple years ago. Now that we are passing through this time, many people became financial experts all of a sudden. Everyone is capable of offering sound financial advises today.

The American dream is a right for all Americans. I feel that it is really rude and disgusting that many of you is sitting out there and judging this guy that perhaps started from nothing and got all this and now he is the verge of losing it all again. I also don’t understand why you are complaining that he put such a large down payment. Isn’t it the right thing to do? Putting 25% of the loan is what everyone should do. I actually blame all of those speculators that bought homes with nothing down because they are one of the main reasons that brought us here today. Thos speculators are what made Mr. Moussa reach such a place because otherwise his house value wouldn’t have dropped so much.

PS: the comment about his family and them leaving to Beirut is totally absurd and offensive.

Posted by Ayman on 5 March 2009 @ 8pm

Frick. I thought about this some more. I felt really bad. But maybe I’m just over thinking this. Because I do that.

What I meant by my apparently not funny sweeping generalization was only that it seemed that his wife didn’t agree with his decision making. That’s really all that I meant.

Aaryn, I gave you a response that was intended to be taken lightly (it wasn’t, my bad), when what you asked for was discussion and thoughts.

So, my thoughts. Pretty much in line with yours. I think it is a bummer in many ways for those of us who live within our means, have no consumer debt and equity in our houses, and who pay our taxes have to pick up the slack for those who don’t or can’t for whatever reason. But, of course, like you, I’m willing to be part of the solution. It is bigger bummer when I’m part of the solution for someone who did more consuming than contributing in this world.

Finally, I don’t know who Robert is, and he doesn’t know me. (And apparently doesn’t like what I said, or that I said it, and, again, I’m sorry.) But, Aaryn, you know me. I’ve been reading your work before CityBeat, since the first inception of your blog, when it was RubySoho, three years or more ago. You said you weren’t clear about the intent of my comment, but I’m sad to think that you thought that I ascribed particular meaning to them going to Beirut, if you did.

Posted by Cheri @ Blog This Mom! on 5 March 2009 @ 11pm

I’m really thankful for all of the comments here, including the dissenting ones.

@Cheri: I DO know you and didn’t think you meant anything by your initial comment but the tone wasn’t clear. Please don’t feel bad. You clarified what you meant and I sort of thought that might have been what you were aiming for.

@s and Ayman: You both make some good points. A large down payment on an expensive home should be what happens. And yes, anyone—wealthy or otherwise—could be in a “financial pickle.” In fact, many are. And while I agree that there is a lot of personal responsibility involved in what’s happened here, there has also been a lot of unscrupulous predation and this is where I find it difficult to feel as badly for the man in the NYTimes article as I do for the guy who had nothing until he he received a visit from a mortgage broker telling him that in the current housing boom, he, too could have a slice of the American dream.

Not everyone is educated enough to understand what a No-Interest, No-Asset (NINA) loan really meant. And while there are many people who knew they were getting in over their heads, there were others who thought they had a ticket to something stable. If you have nothing and someone offers you a home—the quintessential definition of stability and success—then it’s likely you’re going to jump at it.

It’s just easier for me to feel sorry for the guy who got duped or the guy who works three jobs and can’t make ends meet than it is for me to feel sorry for this guy. Like I said before, if he had a 4K mortgage for only one year, then he must have had some sort of adjustable rate mortgage and was gambling. He was the educated one, living his life in a manner similar to that of the people to whom he sold cars. He had the money and he chose to take the risk. And now he’s on the homepage of the Times. I just couldn’t help but roll my eyes. (Incidentally, I’m personally very tired of hearing people say that “nobody saw this coming.” If you were at all following the news, it was clear that it was coming and that it was going to be big. People just didn’t want to believe it.)

To be clear, I’m not saying I’m right, here. This is a really tough issue. Like Jenn said above, I am willing to be part of the solution because it hurts everyone to have homes foreclose and surrounding property devalued. People are desperate and that leads to desperate behaviors. We’re all in this together. But this particular example is just a little bit offensive to me.

For anyone who has an hour of down time, I recommend you listen to The Giant Pool of Money. It was produced in March of 2008, before the housing bubble burst and will give you the devastating picture of what greedy bankers and investors and mortgage brokers did to people. It might sound boring but it’s not. I promise.

There’s also a follow-up, Bad Bank, that ran last week. I haven’t listened to it yet, but I’m sure it’s great in a depressing, drink-vodka-straight-from-the-bottle kind of way.

Posted by aaryn b. on 6 March 2009 @ 7am

Aaryn, I have to disagree with you that this is the PERFECT story of people living beyond their means. I think this person represents a (thankfully) very small minority of people.

Maybe I do have a bit of that optimist gene, but I think most people bought more than they could afford believing the lines the realtors fed them that their income and home value could only go up, and they would afford it one day. Sure, they should have known better, but they wanted to believe in the American Dream.

Having said that, I’m so mad that people who were irresponsible, overly naieve, and even outright dishonest, are getting better mortgage rates than me. Why should I be responsible when the irresponsible are always bailed out? I have asked myself this question many times in a familial context. Ahem.

To help surpress my anger, I consider this: if my neighbor smokes in bed and sets his/her house on fire, do I let the house burn down to punish them for their stupidity, and take the chance that my house will burn down as well? No, I think that would be stupid.

Posted by Pam on 6 March 2009 @ 2pm

After reading all the comments I’m hesitant to weigh in. Because of what we’re going through right now, my filter makes it hard for me to look at this from both sides, reserve snap judgments and feel empathy for another person who’s in trouble. Right now? All I want to say to Mr. Greedy Hand Out Guy is Fuck. You.

Posted by Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy on 6 March 2009 @ 10pm