aaryn belfer.

Asshat, definitely! Self-absorbed, yeah, that too I suppose.

Still… don’t you find yourself annoyingly possessed of at least a little smidgen of sympathy for these folks caught in the meat grinder of media scrutiny? Not that I’m defending Sanford. I see no reason to cut him any slack given the hypocrisy of his actions .vs. his political stance. But when was the last time you read about an unfaithful politician or celebrity who was portrayed by the media as anything other than an utter scumbag or whoring tramp? Not sure I’ve ever seen it.

Now contrast that with infidelity as it occurs in the “real” world. I suspect many of us know someone who is having an affair (or that we think ought to have an affair) for reasons that, while complicated, make pretty good sense: the couple “grew apart”, the alchoholic wife, the chronically depressed dad. There are plenty of marriages in limbo between “blissful” and “divorced”. Hell, look at the Clintons – like her or not, would you really blame Hillary if she’d found herself a studly boy toy while on the campaign trail? “Serve that bastard Bill right, eh!” … or maybe not. Regardless, marriages are complex beasts, painted in all sorts of greys, and they don’t stand up well when seen through the starkly black-and-white filter of our American cultural mores.

Thus, I can’t help but think that somewhere in the parade of celebrity relationship implosions we see on a daily basis, there are actually one or two where the asshat-in-question might not actually be such an asshat.

… I’m not putting my money on Sanford being one of those though.

Posted by Robert K on 30 June 2009 @ 4pm

we have been trippin on this man ALL day at work – truly unbelievable!

Posted by Candy Stick Lane on 30 June 2009 @ 5pm

@Robert: Oh, I could give a rats ass who Sanford (or anybody else, for that matter) pokes. Nobody knows what goes on in the relationship of anyone else and it’s presumptuous for anyone to pass holier-than-thou judgment on breached marital contracts. But this guy is a policy maker who has opposed not only gay marriage but civil unions and adoption of children by gays. The hypocrisy is stunning.

And what really nauseates me about the Sanford thing, is the way he gets up there and cries and compares himself to biblical kings and seems to think that if he tells the public of his deep and meaningful love that he is somehow absolved. Sure, he’s human. But he’s grossing me out with the whole Thorn Birds thing. Wouldn’t it be enough to say, “Yeah, I cheated and I’ve philandered before and that’s all you need to know. I resign.” ?

Posted by Aaryn on 30 June 2009 @ 8pm

@Aaryn, re: “Yeah, I’ve cheated … I resign”

Sooo… if a politician is unfaithful they should resign automatically? Bit of a slippery slope, that. What if Obama should decide to repair the damage Clinton’s dalliance with a homely intern did to our world standing, and step out with a respectably hot politico. What then?

Or is it only hypocritical politicians that should resign? Their supporters will argue that one person’s hypocrisy doesn’t indict their whole value system. “It’s just a personal failing.” And like it or not, I think they’d be right.

Yet there is a very compelling and rarely discussed argument for why unfaithful politicians should resign: By putting themselves in a position where they can be blackmailed and extorted they compromise their ability to do the job they were elected to do. Imagine the leverage one of Clinton’s foes would have had if they’d known about the Lewinsky thing before it came to light. By allowing themselves to be caught out in such a vulnerable position, these politicians show a lack of judgement and discretion that does call into question their ability to properly serve.

Posted by Robert K on 1 July 2009 @ 5am

No, I don’t think he should resign because of his infidelity. I don’t know that he should resign at all, though I certainly can’t imagine he’s getting a whole lot of work done at this point. And how effective a leader he is in light of his melodrama.

I just said that because it seems like he’s making his situation worse by the day, and resignation would be an easy way for him to move out of the limelight (which he probably doesn’t want to do since he’s so in love with himself and his emotions). The only thing that I think should be looked at is whether his state funded his sex junkets to Argentina and wherever.

Honestly, I just find the whole thing to be a bit…Harlequin-y and with each successive apology, with each tearful confession, he seems ever more disingenuous. Yesterday, the AP reporter who interviewed him (for THREE HOURS over a period of two days! Good lord! Over an AFFAIR???) said that the governor really seems to want to talk. If this is the case, I’d suggest he talk less to the media and find himself a good therapist. Or just find himself a nice religious retreat where he can assuage his guilt with scripture and revel in what a good Christian he is since he’s admitted to his sins.

Lastly, it does bug that he should be so vehement in his anti-gay views. I guess marriage and love and, yes, adultery are reserved only for straights.

Posted by aaryn b. on 1 July 2009 @ 7am

I think he should resign. Not because of the infidelity, but because he went AWOL for nearly a week. That’s a dereliction of duty; what is something serious had happened while is was on another continent and nobody on his staff knew? Even if he’d been in Arkansas instead of Argentina, he lied to his staff about an issue of material importance to running the state.

And while I don’t think that politicians’ personal lives should be part of the political discussion in general, if a politician makes a particular issue important, I think his/her behavior with respect to that issue is fair game.

Posted by Wehaf on 1 July 2009 @ 2pm

Asshat is right. Because it was “a love story” it’s OK. And the “other dalliances” were also OK because they weren’t serious. WT*? Yes, he’s only human, but he’s supposed to be a LEADER. I expect more.

Posted by ~annie on 2 July 2009 @ 6am

My favorite part is the title.

Posted by Middle-Aged-Woman on 18 July 2009 @ 7am