God Bless America (aka The Good, The Bad and The Ugly)
Real questions I received from grown adults during a 24-hour period this past weekend. Ruby was within earshot for all of them:
“Adoption? That is so wonderful! I want to adopt my 20-year old maid. I love her but I don’t know how to adopt her.”
“Why is her skin black and yours isn’t?”
“Do you like that color of skin?”
“Does she know she’s adopted?”
“Why would you tell her? Why would you do that?”
“Did you know you were getting a black baby?”
I really want to know what goes on in these people’s heads that *this* is the stuff they let us hear.
What could they possibly be they filtering out as too rude/insane/racist if this is what they think passes for appropriate comments/questions?
You can’t be serious? I can’t believe you would find yourself in the company of that many ignorant adults…within a 24 hour period.
People are just plain disappointing and stupid a lot of the time, aren’t they.
Unbelievable.
I feel ya! I heard the same crap when I was growing up with my white parents – and I agree with first comment – what are they filtering out? thats the scary part – and of course once you hit school then the kids say ALL sorts of madness – sheesh!
YIKES! people can be so clueless…
Don’t worry, you’ll show all those clueless idiots when Ruby gets that basketball scholarship at Stanford.
(Wait, what? What do you mean she doesn’t play basketball?)
Are you serious?
But you know, kids could never come up with such stupid and inappropriate comments.
I never believed people were like this until I took my friend’s developmentally disabled son to Seagrove Park in Del Mar. I almost cried over the rudeness and insensitivity.
Ah yes. Lovely.
We were asked when our son was 11 months old if ‘they’ just ‘know’ how to use chopsticks automatically.
Another- did we worry his eyes are too ‘squinty’.
Geez oh Man! GEEZ OH MAN!
You know, I tried to come up with a stupid and/or offensive (yet devastatingly clever) remark to post about this, but I couldn’t think of anything stupider or more offensive than the above…
I find this unbelievable! Can you tell your responses? Would they have been different with Ruby out of earshot?
Am I a bafoon as well if I ask how you parent through such situations?
I would love to know the setting of such commenters… Also, the responses. Idiots!
Seriously? In a 24 hour period that many stupid, ignorant comments? Where are you hanging out girl? Even kids who don’t have the ability to filter things yet don’t behave this way. I’d also love to hear your responses and how Ruby reacted. People are really really ignorant and unaware of what they say… I have to hope that because if those people really knew what they were saying, we’re in a heap of trouble for the future!
I’m an adoptive mom and I’ve heard:
“What’s his Mom like?”
“Did you get to pick his name?”
“What town does his Mom live in?”
People just have no idea. I’ve tried hard to let it roll off my shoulders, but I also feel like it’s an opportunity to educate.