This picture was taken when Ruby was three weeks old, during my second week of mothering. It was early in the triathlon of late night feedings, diaper changes, and the seemingly endless shooshing of a crying baby, and already Sam and I were exhausted. We’d had 36 hours—not 9 months—to prep ourselves for parenthood (the [...]
Within a week after the news that Torry Ann Hansen had put her 7-year-old adopted son alone on a flight to Russia carrying with him her resignation letter, we received a thick envelope from our adoption agency. I thought it was a request for a donation, so when I read the contents, my stomach dropped. [...]
(Originally published at The Women’s Colony on Tuesday February 2, 2010.) I had dinner and drinks last night with two friends from my adoption group. One of them has three adopted children. Her eldest, a 7-year-old son, is from Haiti. My friend went there to meet him when he was ten days old. She lived [...]
After attending a kindergarten forum last night, Sam and I headed to our favorite neighborhood bar for some decompression. Wasn’t it just last week that we were bringing a baby home from Chicago? How is it possible we’re getting her ready to go to school? And is that really a gray eyebrow growing in above [...]
I’m late to the party but that’s because I’ve been mulling it over and doing a little background research. Better late than never, though. So, I’ve begun over here. There will be more.
One comb out, a few tears, a great new stylist and 3-1/2 hours later (no, that’s not a typo), this is what her hair looks like. She chose the “clicky-clackies” and her birthmother chose me.
She is my own and I am her real mother ********************************************* The first night we met Ruby, she pooped in Sam’s hand. It was 11 p.m. in a rented apartment in Chicago. We were exhausted from an entire day of travel, preceded by two sleepless nights spent absorbing the holy-shit-we-have-a-kid realization that most people have [...]
I think everybody should have to do the Bead Exercise. And I think everybody should listen to this piece…which you have to do if you want to know what the Bead Exercise is.
Real questions I received from grown adults during a 24-hour period this past weekend. Ruby was within earshot for all of them: “Adoption? That is so wonderful! I want to adopt my 20-year old maid. I love her but I don’t know how to adopt her.” “Why is her skin black and yours isn’t?” “Do [...]
And this morning we had a very frank conversation… Ruby: Mama, you need to brush your teeth. Me: I already did that, honey. It was the first thing I did when I got up, before I got dressed. Ruby: You need to brush your teeth again because your teeth are really dirty. Me: My teeth [...]