thematically fickle

There are certain fashion statements that I loathe, a few of which I’ve never mentioned while others I’ve made no small secret of here (and there and everywhere else). These trends—which make me want to splash a glass of cold water in the face of the wearer—include Crocs, Uggs, cotton jersey culotte pants, bubble skirts, [...]

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For whatever reason, I received a catalog from “Birkis” today. Have you seen their shoes? They’re obviously the toothless bastard cousin of Crocs (which I loathe just slightly more than cotton jersey culotte pants). To look at them is to realize everything that is wrong with America, an offense that is underscored when mom, [...]

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Me (whispered into his ear): Baby? You awake?
Him: …
Me: Honey? (Kiss, kiss…kisskisskiss on his stubbly cheek) Are you sleeping? I need to ask you a quick question. Very important.
Him: Mmmmm…I was sorta sleepin’…what’s up?
Me (Kiss, kiss): Did you remember to bring home that black sweater for me from work?
Him: Yup.
Me: REALLY?!
Him: Already washed. Laying flat [...]

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Every time I see a thirteen year old girl clunking through an airport or a mall in Ugg boots and a matching velour tracksuit with the word PINK embroidered across her tender young buttocks in collegiate-style lettering, I can’t help but think there is something distastefully wrong with the message. So, I had a [...]

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